Making Our Relationships Healthy By Uncovering Unhealthy Love Patterns


In order to help make our relationships healthy its important that we uncover our particular love patterns and see how they are impacting on our love relationships. With this exercise it‘s not about looking who to blame or feeling shameful. But it is about taking a heartfelt look at how we ‘do relationships’.

So to get started take some time to reflect on what thoughts flow through your mind when you expereince uncomfortable feelings when interacting with your loved one to provide you with insight into your particular patterns of behaviour. 

Do you feel for example feel you are never considered; or that you always have to sacrifice your needs; or  you have a need for constant approval:  or you can’t bear to be alone so you want to be with your partner every moment possible and vary rarely give them personal space to do things on their own?

Whatever you uncover notice if there is a sense of victimisation you feel about a particular pattern? And does it feel as if it is happening to you against your will?

Then look to see how you might be co-creating this particular dynamic? If your pattern is not being wanted, do you reject others first because deep down you are expecting to be rejected?.

The key here is to remain detached and acknowledge with out any blame or self discrimination when looking within.

Love patterns inhibit our growth with love and stifle our relationships, and in order for a relationship to blossom it needs to breath. It needs its own space to flourish.

Unhealthy patterns take away that vital breath a relationship relies on making it difficult or impossible for the relationship to transcend the wonderful heights of passion and joy where it can take us.


About Sandy Hounsell

My speciality is turning your pain into power...

Since 2001 I have been helping transform women’s and men’s lives in healing the trauma experienced through abuse, by dissolving the root cause and the manifestation of those experiences like unhealthy relationships, anxiety, depression, self sabotaging behaviours, repetitive patterns that has disconnected you, from the Real You...Read More >

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